by Adi Stein
This isn’t some long article about democracy and how the Electoral College is bullshit or about how clearly America is just full blown racist or about how this president obviously isn’t an anomaly or anything else. This is it. This is the whole idea: 2020 is the Bloodborne of elections. And we are going to beat it.
We are going to beat it the same way that I beat Bloodborne. We’re going to beat it slowly, with patience, and without freaking the fuck out.
At the time of this writing we have only a handful of states left to call. With Biden up in Arizona and Nevada and gaining steadily in Pennsylvania and Georgia, we are at the end of the final boss battle of the game. Our health is low, we’re nearly out of blood vials, and if we have one small miss in any of these places we will lose. But also, like, look at the boss’s health! He’s barely got anything left! If we just get in one more hit this will be it!
But the most important thing now is that we can’t get greedy. We need to count every vote in every state. We need to literally dodge the enemy’s projectiles and make sure that we slowly and steadily get closer and closer until that little sliver left in his health bar is gone. We shouldn’t try to get fancy with any new play styles right now. We shouldn’t try to change things up to stay fresh. We just need to wait for an opening and land our hits when it arrives. Tried and true. That’s how we will win.
Bloodborne is a great game (one of the best of the generation, some might say) but it was a hard game that took so much commitment and energy to finish. It was difficult and devastating but also rewarding and inspiring. By taking my time and learning how to actually play, I eventually defeated the final boss and won the game. Same goes for this election. But, you know, with, like, millions of human lives at stake.